Have you ever tasted cherry flavoured ice cream at the tip of the sun orbiting a large block of cheese?
Of course you haven’t!
Why…you ask? That’s quite a delicious question indeed
The answer, as you can imagine, is twice as obnoxious as the question. It is because pie of course!
As such, we must look to the sophisticated oriental hybrid monkey
To enlighten us with cheese toasted vodka

However, we must take great care as we proceed down the red spiral that is jam
JAM!
'Tis the essence of life indeed
What would life be without jam?
Why, it would be equivalent to milk without lactose
Which is, in itself...soy milk
Beware the Murphyliciousness of soy, in its soggy attempt to brainwash chickens

Alas, soy life is very flaccid
Flaccid...what a wonderful word
Although not nearly as wonderful as bulbous isn’t it?
It sounds as if Monday’s taste like socially awkward situations does it not?
No? Maybe earwax flavoured Jell-O consumed by the ego of seagulls then?

Well whatever the case
Ticky ticky van knuck to you
Who have yet to experience the joys of 2-(4 bromo-2, 5-dimethoxy-phenyl)-ethylamine
Never once let it slip from your consciousness the quasi-fact that a spoonful of drums helps the happiness come out
Especially if you fail to perpendicularize the pocket lint caused by over use of jazz hands
And that, dear friend(s), is how mouldy toothpaste changes the price of bread.